I am my Father’s daughter. I have so many of his mannerisms that I can predict with almost 99% accuracy what he is thinking or saying. Growing up, I looked up to my dad, and he was/is my best friend. I would tell him everything and still, to this day, do so. And he never judged me or told me what to do – which is probably why I told him everything.
My relationship with my mom was more of a rebellious nature, primarily around marriage. It seemed to eclipse all other memories. My mom wanted me to get married, and I did not. Looking back more than the marriage – it was the act of ‘Being Told’ to do something. Life works out in mysterious ways, and I decided to do my MBA to avoid marriage. And I met my husband, Adam, during my MBA. As Master Oogway says in Kung-fu panda, ‘You often meet your destiny on the road you take to avoid it.’
I took the course ‘Creativity and Personal Mastery’, which started changing my relationship with Mom. I was beginning to see where people were coming from. Yes, for the longest time ever, I was very selfish – still am but relatively less. And I understood her more than before. And as I have grown as a woman and been a wife, the understanding has increased. And my respect and appreciation for what a mother does have shot up exponentially.
Switching tracks, my brother has two daughters. And the youngest one was born when my parents were there. And I watched my mom and my dad interacts with the baby. My dad was amazed at what she did and said, ‘Wow, she grabbed my finger.’ And my mom even watching her over skype – the unconditional love in her eyes was so evident. She didn’t have to say it, but it was so clear that she was just so happy that my niece existed – however she was, regardless of what she was doing. I do not think my mom existed in that space – isn’t that wonderful. My niece responded to that love in ways that she did not to others. It is the unspoken language of true love. When I am sick, I want my mom around me. I am sure most of us do.
Women in my mom’s generation got married relatively young and were primarily housewives. They cooked and cooked and cooked some more. My mom still cooks for us as a family when we are all together. And she does that without any grumbling. I complain if I have to cook during the week or if cooking takes more than fifteen minutes. Granted that I have a day job. My mom and others like her have made peace with what is for the most of their lives. They have surrendered and learnt to live with the present moment and accept what it offers. There is very little resistance. All roads lead to Rome.
Recognize the mother nature in you and rejoice in it!