As some of you know, I am in a new role. Fortunately or unfortunately, four managers have left in the last five years – while that is a problem in itself. An impact of that is that my team was left rudderless to fend for themselves in the corporate jungle. They did the best they could and formed a clique of their own. Then, I came along with my ideas, wanting to be a part of a team. As you can imagine, that ruffled a few feathers – all of a sudden, they were being asked to be accountable, own things – and do them by a certain timeline, and somebody wanted to see their work.

Quote: Be True to yourself, stay focused and stay you, take advice from other folks, and use what you can but never mind what is not for you. For the most part, trust yourself and believe in what you are doing.

At the ninety-day mark, this is to be expected. The team and I now have a sense of what each other is like – so I decided to share my life map with them. That should give them a flavour of who I am and how I behave—the life map talks about breaking barriers as a girl in my somewhat conservative extended family. I was the first girl to do engineering, go abroad, do an MBA and marry a foreigner. This required me to rebel at every stage in my life – even simple things like wearing jeans, cutting my hair, reading books and not cooking.

The true measure of your character is what you do when nobody’s watching.

I asked my team for comments, and one of them said – ‘You won’t take no for an answer unless that’s your answer as well.’ I chuckled when I read that because those who know me will agree wholeheartedly. I did not get to where I am today by saying yes to everything. I had to say NO to so much growing up that my first reaction was to rebel. Now, did I already have this gene or was it a trait I acquired? We will never know. And it does not matter – what matters is that it is the reality today.

I thought about it some more, and the reason I take a firm stance is that I don’t have another alternative. When I decided to marry Adam, it was as strong knowing that there was no way I could go to my wedding and put the garland on another man. It was a physical knowing – my body knew the truth. And in most cases, like doing engineering, it was like I was just playing the script that was written. Don’t get me wrong, there are things that I will put my foot down on, knowing that it is just me being stubborn. But, for things that really matter, it is not my choice – it is the universe working through me. And I am not saying I am like a puppet but more like a dance with the universe. The universe takes the lead, and I follow, or it’s like why writing is an act of faith. I show up to write and see what needs to be written. Sometimes, life is the same – I show up, and then it shows up.

Now, I am thinking what the point of the blog was – maybe there was no point. It just needed to be written, and it did. How do you show up in your life?

Leave a Reply