I found this new cafe in Columbus called Joyas – opened by a Bengali-American chef. And today was another one of my favourites – grey, rainy day, so I thought, let’s check the cafe out and get something spicy Indian ishytle.
I got a break during lunch, rushed over – placed my order. It was bustling but a cosy cafe. When my order came after fifteen minutes, I walked towards my food order, picked it up and left. The employee looked a little confused, but I did not give it another thought. I came back home to realize that I had picked up Phil’s order – I called the cafe, and they still had my order which I went and picked up.
The point of narrating this real-life incident is to say that – I was so confident as I picked up Phil’s order that the employee, despite thinking why is an Indian female picking up Phil’s order – let me get away with it. This incident made me think about everything I get away with. On second thoughts, listing them out here might be a career-limiting move – but the one thing that I do get away with is being a published author. I have published four books – one of them just this week. And despite that, when somebody refers to me as a published author, I have to remind myself that they are talking about me. Every time somebody tells me they are going to buy my book – I get flutters in my stomach thinking that now they will find out I am not a good author.
It’s like I live in two worlds – when I am actually writing, I am an author without even thinking about it. And when I am not writing but thinking about it – then the doubt starts to creep in. That’s the censor in the creative world which mirrors our real life. When we are not thinking, we are our true selves; when we are thinking, we are an illusion. If this statement resonated with you and stuck a chord in your somewhere, then there is a high possibility that you may enjoy my book. And if not, maybe the time is not right.
I will admit that my book is not for everyone – especially this one called Break Free – A guide to being free from suffering. My previous books spoke more to the intellectual, mind side of you but this book talks to the not-mind in you. Only if you have experience stillness or have a strong desire to be in that space will this book call out to you. I am not dissuading anybody from buying my book but just expressing what I am thinking.
The one thing that I can say confidently is that this book has not been written by me. I was the medium through which this book expressed itself – so how can I take credit for the book when the content just came to me? I know that because I read my book, and I am amazed sometimes, and if I write again, what comes out will be very different. That is the beauty of creativity – always fresh and always in the moment, just like the imposter syndrome.
Here is the link to the book on amazon.com if you are interested, or you can search for Anu Morris Break Free in whatever part of the globe you live. The book will find its way to you when the time is right. Are you ready?