How to Bust Loose From The Suffering Game

Let’s walk through the following scenarios.

A manager at work has just become a people leader for the first time. And he is having a hard time getting this team to do what he wants and how he wants it.

A lead in a company is struggling to find the balance between doing the work herself vs getting others to do it.

A young lad is trying to get over his first love.

An older woman is not able to break the constraints of poverty she had faced in childhood.

And there are countless such life situations that you, me and others are going there. If it weren’t for these, life would be like a boring movie with no twists and plots. But there is a reason for these twists and plots – to help us bust through the situation/condition which is causing us to be unhappy/stressed/miserable/suffer. Life provides these so-called challenges/problems/obstacles so that we can do the work to bust through them. And one thing you can be sure about is that life or the universe will not let go until you have learnt your lesson. Initially, it will be gentle nudges, and if you move through that – perfect. But, if you manage to exert your willpower and avert the lesson, life will eventually give you a tight slap or put you in a corner where you have no choice but to face your unease.

So, what does it mean to bust through a life situation? Let’s try it with some of the scenarios I mentioned before.

The manager at work has to get out of his way and stop telling people what to do. Maybe growing up, he was a star student, getting good grades – always good at what he did, and now with a team of people, he is not able to do that because people are unpredictable. One of the things that the manager has to bust through is his need to get it ‘perfect’ as per his standards and make peace with what he might consider a ‘lower quality of work.

The young lad has to bust through his fear of opening up to another person. He needs to be comfortable with letting them in his life. He has to accept that there are no guarantees that this person will not break his heart too!

Young growing flower in a desert sand

And if the manager and the lad make peace with their life situation, they will see an all-around change in their lifestyle and the people around them. That’s how it works because that hole you just busted through gives space for new things to happen, and that changes you as a person. And when you change as a person, the way you see the world also changes. That is why it is powerful first to find what is that one thing that you need to bust through and then smash through it.

Is it easy? No, and it may take days, seconds, years or lifetimes to bust through it. This is where each of us had to balance exerting willpower to bust through vs letting it happen – hurry slowly. All profound things in life are a paradox.

Now, does it mean that once you have busted through, you will have no other problems? No – but you will get better at busting through problems.

What do you need to bust through for a breakthrough?

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